I have owned a car for almost an year, and it is only now that I am somewhat comfortable driving it on the wonderful roads here. The amount of care that the local body puts into the construction and maintenance of roads is unbeliveable. A few examples :
- Potholes right next to a traffic light. When the light is orange, and you step on (or twist) the accelerator, you just cannot miss the pothole. You almost make a journey to the centre of the earth.
- Spine, er, Speed breakers. Scientifically designed to give maximum pain to anyone driving over it at speeds above 1 cm/min.
- Double speed breakers. You cross one and relax, and then wham ! you run into a wall in the middle of the road. Closer inspection proves that it was intended to be a speed breaker, not a property delimiter.
- When it rains, the roads look smooth. However, under water, you would find height differences that would put the surface of the moon to shame. A deadly 12 feet deep drain and the level road right next to it look the same when both are submerged under water.
However, I am digressing. This post is about driving styles, or rather, about my driving style.
Put me on a two wheeler, and I am as comfortable as a fish in water (non-polluted, one must add). Changing gears, braking, ducking and weaving, high speed jumps ( to negotiate the aforementioned double speed breakers), etc come naturally to me.
However, add another three wheels (two for movement and one for control), and my comfort level becomes similar to that of the previously mentioned fish when it decides to take a walk on land (unless it happens to belong to certain species of catfish which have no problems moving about on land). I have a loud driving style. Loud does not mean flashy and stylish. I literally keep swearing non-stop throughout the drive. Puts me in a spot when I have to chauffer the fairer sex.
Anyway, here is a (non-exhaustive) list of topics that, according to my friend, I touched upon during the drive.
- The parentage of the other drivers.
- Speculations about their IQ, and comparisons between it and the room temperature (at night, in a cold city). (Often favouring the room temperature).
- The IQ of the person who issued the driving license. (Comparisons between their IQ and the temperature at midnight in the north pole, always favouring the temperature).
- Questions about the sanity of other drivers.
- Questions about their ability to see and hear.
- Questions about their ability to distinguish colors.
I wonder what the other drivers are thinking about when they drive…
